Officers ready themselves to break down the door of a known lawn scofflaw. The incidence of lazy lawn care has skyrocketed in this last lawn care season. "The morals of our children are at stake," said one officer, as he slipped a clip into his AR-15. Another officer standing behind his bullet proof shield said, "The dandelion population has gotten completely out of hand, even in the south side of town. Now that's a place that we used to be able to count on." Just then the homeowner came out on his porch to check his mail.
"Hey," he said, "what are you lot doing in my yard?"
"We're here to enforce the lawn ordinance," the lead officer said from behind his shield.
"The what?" the homeowner said.
"The lawn ordinance, you've got some pretty tall grass here."
The homeowner scanned the row of cops standing on his lawn, "look, the tree cops were here last week and they told me that I shouldn't be establishing a lawn around my trees, it wasn't natural."
"We can't help what they say," the lead cop said. "Trees aren't part the lawn ordinance."
to be continued next spring...
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