Monday, December 8, 2014

Our DEAR SUPREME LEADER suggests enjoying this winter a special way.

Fieldville -- Our Dear Supreme Leader has suggested citizen and resident alike can enjoy a very special Fieldville treat this winter.  He suggest a high protein sauna at one of Fieldville's many productive enclosed temperate controlled sties.  

"The high protein steam bath is just the thing on a winters day to make one feel fresh and in apple pie order," stated Trismegistys Dear Supreme Leader after his high protein sauna this morning.

Citizens of Fieldville should recognize the value of a high protein sauna on these cold winter days.

 Our Dear Supreme Leader enjoys a bracing high protein sauna earlier this morning.

Saturday, December 6, 2014


Our Dear Supreme Leader
at his inauguration
100 years ago today 

Thursday, December 4, 2014

Street Level 
A NEW DAY DAWNS OVER FIELDVILLE

Our Dear Supreme Leader has returned from his long hiatus at Mud Lake to set things right in dear Fieldville.  With Festivus season upon us it is in the nick of time say many residents of this sprawling metropolis.  Grimmy Claws will be coming to town soon and the return of our Dear Supreme Leader is what Fieldville needs to assure another year of the upper class citizens.  Our Dear Supreme Leader has reanimated Biff to protect the better class of Fieldville Citizens.

Biff is back.
Thank you for your support.

Tuesday, December 11, 2012

Dick and Jane Muse

Fieldville - today Dick and Jane muse about their possible new neighbors...

 
Thanks for your support - please send gifting ideas, carpet cleaner, weather stripping,
Qantas flight bags, Pocket Coffee, a new house of representatives, grocery lists, and
1,000,000 euros to street level  on Facebook.

Thursday, August 30, 2012

Fieldville Archaeologists Search for Source of Banjos

Fieldville - Fieldville archaeologists are searching for source of banjos used in certain rites observed in the Artists' District.  Our Dear Beloved Supreme Leader has decreed that banjos are flagrantly used in secret ceremonies among the residents of the Artists' District.  A spokesperson for the palace stated, "Our Dear Beloved Supreme Leader is concerned with the banjo question because the banjo is a known gateway instrument to other musical instruments and then to full-time music playing.  While the residents of the Artists' District can seem happy-go-lucky, good citizens know that music is poor moral hygiene.
Fieldville Archaeologists Searching for the Source of Banjos

Tuesday, May 1, 2012

New Porch Added to Palace

Fieldville - Our Dear Beloved Supreme Leader has added a new porch to the palace.  A spokesperson told Street Level today Our Dear Beloved Supreme Leader just wants to look at the little people as they go about their tiny lives.
Watching little people going about their tiny lives

Tuesday, April 24, 2012

New Release From the Palace

 Fieldville - The palace has just released the new "Our Dear Beloved Supreme Leader" devotional lamp.  It's perfect for every citizen's Proctorial Home Sanctorium.  Fully approved by Local #42 of the Brotherhood of the Druidic Path, the new Our Dear Beloved Supreme Leader devotional lamp will light citizen families' meditations on Our Dear Beloved Supreme Leader's benign magnificence.  Required in each citizen's Proctorial Home Sanctorium, by this Friday, the Our Dear Beloved Supreme Leader devotional lamp may be purchased near the Citizens' Gate of the palace at the Proctor of Cash and Carry booth - cash only(special devotional bulb not included).

Our Dear Beloved Supreme Leader devotional lamps now available!

Tuesday, April 17, 2012

Biff Ronny Introduces Buffy

Cattown - Biff Ronny introduced Buffy today during a grueling sweep of the Cattown Coffee Shoppe District.  He has added a bit more to his stump speech - he now says that when he wins the presidency of Cattown he will let the laid-off workers from the defunct Cattown Potato Cannery work on every menial job in Cattown for the sake of their dignity.

Biff introduces Buffy

Tuesday, April 10, 2012

3rd Anniversary Coming in 6 Weeks

Fieldville - the palace reminds all citizens that the third anniversary of the world-famous Fieldville Tire Station is coming in six weeks and the celebrations will be bigger and better than ever.  Still burning, the Fieldville Tire Station Fire can be seen as far away as Flattburgh and even to the edge of the earth.  Citizens are invited to bring a tire or two to throw into the Cob Park Fountain and make a wish - you won't get your wish unless you play.

Bring a tire and make a wish.

Friday, April 6, 2012

Cattown Lection Coverage - Biff With His Sword of Morality

Cattown - Presumed front-runner Biff Ronny today scaled the walls of Cattown College with his sword of morality.  As he neared the top he was heard to say, "I've had enough of this big government - all the egghead professors here are immoral democratists on the public dole.  When I'm President of Cattown I'll privatize Cattown College.  We'll sell the naming rights and outsource teaching to more efficient cheap labor from the Artists' District."

Immoral egghead professors beware.

Thursday, April 5, 2012

Special Cattown Coverage II

Cattown - Front runner Biff Ronny said today, "Poor people are stupid they're all complaining about gas prices - well when I want to get somewhere I just fly."

Poor people are stupid

Wednesday, April 4, 2012

Special Cattown Coverage

Cattown - Your correspondent has crossed the border of the Free Territories of Fieldville into the vile Provence of Cattown to cover what they call lections.  It seems that lections are where citizens select their own leaders rather than do it the right way.  This year is having a lection for president of Cattown, running against the current president is the former Governor of Lead Junction Biff Ronny.  Biff Ronny started his campaign for president of Cattown when he received the golden sword of morality from a vortex of righteousness that formed at his feet in front of his mansion.
Biff Ronny accepting his Sword of Morality.

Tuesday, April 3, 2012

The Minister of Morality (Pro Tem) Reports a Spike in Thought Crime

Fieldville - The Minister of Morality (Pro Tem) has reported a spike in thought crime this week.  He believes that it is tied somehow to the satanic items dug up two years ago by the Municipal  Archaeologist during Fieldville's Cob Park Revitalization Project. Thaumaturgic radiance has also shown up after that project and there are no longer any cats in Cob Park.  Chupacabras have been seen walking the halls of Fieldville High and there has been no music coming over the walls of the Artists' District for over 6 days.  The Minister of Morality (Pro Tem) has said, "Whenever portents appear in the sky or Crooked Crick turns to blood, your regular citizen becomes jumpy and disconcerted, but that belies trust in the infallibility of Our Dear Beloved Supreme Leader and the Council of Proctors - which, of course, is a serious thought crime."
Thought Crimes are on the rise.
Our Dear Beloved Supreme Leader SEZ: Don't Worry Be Happy!

Saturday, March 31, 2012

The Minister of Morality (Pro Tem) Warns Parents of Morality Collar Removal

Fieldville - The Minister of Morality (Pro Tem) has warned parents of Morality Collar removal.  Speaking from an undisclosed location the minister said, "It has come to our attention that some parents have been turning a blind eye to wanton removal of Morality Collars on their teenage pre-citizens.  We believe a policy of a real blind eye for collar removal would reduce the frequency of morality scofflaws.  In this case a proxy from the Artists' District can be used for a reasonable "proxy fee".  Please contact the Morality Office in the palace for more details."

An Eye for a Collar policy is now in effect.

Saturday, March 24, 2012

Fieldville's Chief of Lawn Police Declares Today Compulsory Mowing Day

Fieldville - The Chief of Fieldville's Lawn Police has made today a Mandatory Mowing Day.  Citizens have until sundown to hire a resident of the Artists' District to have their lawns mowed or suffer a stiff penalty.  Citizen can find the Lawn Police Schedule of  Penalties conveniently posted on the Lawn Police bulletin board in the basement of Lawn Police Headquarters Monday - Friday during regular working hours.

Stiff fines await Lawn Police scofflaws

Sunday, March 18, 2012

Proctor of Justice and Taxes Reminds Citizens That Mandatory Confession Day is Coming

Fieldville  - The Proctor of Justice and Taxes is reminding citizens that Mandatory Confession Day is coming next week.  There will be no special dispensations this year, but a new feature this year will be "Turn-in-Your-Neighbor".  Every citizen that turns in a neighbor before Confession Day will get a morality badge to wear until this summer's Accusation Day.

Mandatory Confession Day is Coming.


Saturday, March 17, 2012

Proctor of Rules and Procedures Warns Citizen Parents to BBQ

Fieldville - the Proctor of Rules and Procedures has warned parents that it is time to BBQ.  He has pointed out that best practices dictate that now it the time to BBQ.  Justice and Taxes Enforcers will be checking to see that all citizens are BBQing until further notice.

BBQ's are now considered best practice by the Council of Proctors

Monday, March 12, 2012

Proctor of Rules and Water Features Commits Rivercide.

Fieldville - Citizens and residents alike were treated to a pillar of fire that appeared in the direction of Fieldville's proposed new water feature the "River Pad".  It was learned later that the Proctor of Rules and Water Features, in order protect citizens from enjoying themselves, directed a pillar of fire over the River Pad.  The palace released a brief statement lauding the proctor for his ability to think out of the box and saying losing a river was a small thing compared to losing an entire city's moral fiber.

Rivercide Dismissed.

Sunday, March 11, 2012

Our Dear Beloved Supreme Leader - Tristmegistus Urges Citizens to get More Citrus in Their Diet


Fieldville - Our Dear Beloved Supreme Leader is urging Fieldville citizens to include more citrus in their diets.

Sunday, March 4, 2012

Mud Lake Crowd Astounded.

Our Dear Beloved Supreme Leader astounded a crowd at the Mud Lake Arena yesterday with his ability to curl a really big mask by just a single gesture of his hand.
Thanks for your support

Saturday, March 3, 2012

Nuestro Querido Líder Amado Supremo Gets a New Vehicle

Mud Lake - Nuestro Querido Líder Amado Supremo, formerly known as Our Dear Beloved Supreme Leader.  Has aquired a new vehicle for his personal use.  He is considering importing a few to Fieldville when the weather gets warmer.

Thanks for your support.

Saturday, February 4, 2012

New Official Palace Portrait

Fieldville, while Our Dear Supreme Leader takes a much deserved rest at the winter palace at Mud Lake,  palace officials have released the official Dear Supreme Leader portrait that will be hung in every citizen's home's ancestors room until further notice.
The new official Dear Supreme Leader portrait in now available for purchase at the Citizens Gate of the palace - don't hesitate - new portraits must be hung in citizen's homes by next week.

Wednesday, January 25, 2012

ODBSL-T 22nd Dream

Thanks for your support

Friday, January 13, 2012

ODBSL-T is now at Mud Lake

Mud Lake, the Southern Palace - Our Dear Beloved Supreme Leader is now on his annual retreat to the Southern Palace for some much needed R&R.  On his first night there he boldly stepped into the night waters without his bodyguard.  The Fieldville palace was abuzz this morning with possible implications of this turn of events. The Dear Beloved Supreme Leader's spoke person and direct in line for the Supremenessship, Biff Ronnie said, "I never question Our Dear Beloved Supreme Leader's actions, they're always perfect in every way."
Biff Ronnie does not question Our Dear Beloved Supreme Leader - ever!

Saturday, January 7, 2012

Council of Proctors Introduces the "Candy as Wages Act"

Fieldville - the Candy as Wages Act sailed through the weekly Proctorial meeting last night and is to implemented tomorrow.  The act simply stated allows citizens to pay residents candy instead of wages for yard work, construction, or computer programming.  "They just waste money when you give it to them, this will be much better for everyone, " the Proctor of Justice and Taxes said.

Our Dear Beloved Supreme Leader endorses the Candy as Wages Act.

Wednesday, January 4, 2012

ODSL Uses Thinking Goggles

Fieldville - Our Dear Beloved Supreme Leader has put on is thinking goggles to solve the problem of what to do with the extra day that the International Brotherhood #42 of the Druidic Path has stated will occur this year.  All citizens are urged to take this seriously and work with their local proctor to make this a safe and hygienically moral year for one and all.
Our Dear Beloved Supreme Leader in his "Thinking Goggles"

Thanks for your support please send - thingies, stuff, frough frough, extra commas, backyard/backdoor politicians, Freudian slips, freedom fries, evil-doers, crock-pots, wind-up proclaimer clocks, cotton bricks, peanut brittle ant hills, zip drives, very large nose pads, and tweets to @cjswift ex machina opus felix

Friday, December 30, 2011

Happy Festivus One and All

Fieldville -
A Festivus Repost from 09
Happy Festivus one and all from:
The Dear Supreme Leader, Biff, Frank the Head Druid, the Mayor of Cattown, The entire reconstituted Council of Proctors, Citizens and Residents, of all Zones, the Smith Family Values : Dick, Jane, Sally, Daddy, and of course Sailor Boy, and even from the Artists District.

HAPPY FESTIVUS and a very MERRY PLANTING SEASON.

Summer is almost here!!!!


Thanks for your support - send any proof of intelligent life in the Senate, and tweets to @cjswift

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Grimy Claws is Coming to Town - Soon

Fieldville - As the sun continues to disappear, Grimy Claws is coming to town.  Citizen children know that he knows when they are sleeping and knows when they are awake, he knows when they are good or bad - so they hide under the bed for goodness sake.
If Grimy Claws sees his shadow tomorrow the sun will disappear forever!

Saturday, December 17, 2011

Grimy is Coming

Get under the bed...
Spotted near the North Pole...

Thursday, December 15, 2011

Undead Evil-Doer Zombie Attacks Biff

No Biff, no! Do not let the evil-doer zombie eat your brain!
Fieldville - Today, Biff was attacked by the evil-doer zombie, who remains undead, but dedicated to eating Biff's brain.  While Biff struggled with the zombie his new assistant Jerry played a few riffs to buck him up.