Don't Let This Happen to You

Fieldville - Citizens - Don't Let This Happen to You.  Some citizen's have let the back sides of their homes fall into disrepair.  The Proctor of Beauty and Fines reminds everyone, "Citizens are required to keep all sides of their homes beautiful, even if your home is under a demolishion order due to it not being round."

Don't let your home fall into disrepair just because it is going to be demolished.

Thanks for your support - send paint, 5 pound cell phones, and tweets to @cjswift ex machina

and now the bird...

Thanks Word Bird!

Fieldville Bank Adds Art

Fieldville - In a bold move the Fieldville Bank has added art in front of the citizens door to the bank.  It is rumored that the bank paid more than 50,000 cobs for the addition.  No word from the palace yet as to whether the Dear Supreme Leader considers it appropriate.

Art at the citizens door

Thanks for your support - send tractor tires, rakes, wood chippers, and tweets to @cjswift ex machina

and now for the bird...

Thanks Word Bird

Fieldville Starts Scheduled Garbage Pick Up

Fieldville - The Council of Proctors has declared the third Wednesday of each moon phase "Official Garbage Pick Up Day".  Specially designated residents from the Artists' Zone will comb the streets and pick up citizens' garbage.  The residents are allowed to keep any of the garbage they want and the rest will be taken to the Fieldville Tire Station Fire to be disposed.

Remember the Wednesday before the Full Moon is Garbage Day.

Thanks for your support send - jug-band music, kitchen middens, legacy plastic flower pots, balls of string, and tweets to @cjswift ex machina

and now a word from the bird...

 

Thanks Word Bird!

Cob Park UGO Alive!

Fieldville - The Cob Park UGO has come back to life this week.  As usual it is expected to mysteriously disappear in the next few days.  Scientists and members of local 42 of the Brotherhood of the Druidic Way alike, are stymied. "It beats me," said an unidentified cowled figure, today in the park.  The UGO Unidentified Glowing Object, has been seen every year in the park since the beginning of time, almost a hundred and ten years ago, according to the Proctor of History and Playground Equipment.

Something is changing in Cob Park

Thanks for your support - send radiation suits, gravity belts, hip boots, fingerless gloves, rusty hinges, orange peels, fright wigs, lawn scissors, trigger happy movie extras, and tweets to @cjswift ex machina

and now a word from the bird...

Thanks Word Bird!

Where do all the hippest meet?

⇓⇓⇓Where do all the hippest meet?⇓⇓⇓

Sorry about the link embed codes disabled

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jTjWmC7OT0g&feature=PlayList&p=7B0C96E284CFE395&playnext_from=PL&playnext=1&index=60

⇑⇑⇑Just ask the Orlons ⇑⇑⇑

and btw it is hippest not hippies

Everybody Knows...

Word Bird has asked to be today's special feature.  We decided to add audio to this edition.

Thanks Word Bird!

Thanks for the inspiration from:

Enhanced Email Pick-up Hours

Fieldville - The Proctor of Communications and Photocopies announced today that in the near future Fieldville will have enhanced email pick-up hours. "It's a lot of work to read all citizens' email," said the proctor.  "The Dear Supreme Leader had told us we need to do this to protect citizens from the brain-eating propaganda of Cattown and other evil-doers"

The proctor stated that all citizens will be able to pick up their emails on the second floor of the the Food Barn during the hours between 10 and noon 4 days a week (days to be announced).  He reminded citizens that they must have Fieldville issued ID, no metal in their pockets, or more than one ounce of liquid in order to enter the email pick-up facility.  He hinted that the Council of Proctors is considering adding email sending stations in a building across the street sometime in the future.

Email Pick Up Hours May be Extended to 10 - Noon 4 Days a Week

Thanks for your support - send whatever you want (I won't get it until it is approved) and tweets to @cjswift

ex machina

And the now the bird...

Thanks Word Bird

Fieldville - When last seen Biff was heading north to find the edge of the world there.  The Phenomenon in the firmament today may signal a discovery by Biff - stay tuned for breaking news...

What did Biff find at the north edge of the world

Thanks for your support - send aluminum foil helmets and tweets to @cjswift ex machina

A word from the bird...

Thanks Word Bird!

Scientists tackle the big ones

Fieldville - Scientists today announced they would develop a theory of how it rains.  "It may take many years," said the Proctor of Science and Carnival Safety.  "We already believe that we know pretty much everything else, now's the time to tackle the big questions."

Scientists now ready to handle the big questions

Thanks for your support - send shelter from the storm, something from under the boardwalk, an ode to Billy Joe, leader of the pack, dead man's curve, Lucy in the sky with diamonds, blowing in the wind, Dunesteef pliers, mutant frogs, and tweet to @cjswift ex machina

A word from the bird...

Thanks Word Bird

Street Level is visiting the old home place

Somewhere Near Fieldville - Street Level is going to see the old home place.  Oh, the memories there at the old place - playing in the yard tires, picnics in the shed, the sandbox/catbox near the ditch, and the smell of dust from the road - it just doesn't get any better than this.

Memories are made of this!

Thanks for your support - send siding, tetanus boosters, bite plates, thick leather belts, malathion cakes, snorkels, seed packs, Strunk and White Elements of Style, Extreme Make-over FEMA trailers, transistor radios, dental fillings, and tweets to @cjswift ex machina

Now, the bird...

Cattown Employs Subliminal Warfare Against Fieldville

Fieldville - Again the evil-doers of Cattown are attacking the very fabric of Fieldville morals and family values.  Now the cowards are using subliminal messages against the DSL and our treasured political system.  Guards from the Proctorate of Justice and Taxes have been collecting leaflets from around Cob Park, reportedly left by Cattown thugs and ruffians.  Citizens are urged to not look if they see one of the offending leaflets.

If you see this don't look at it!!!

Thanks for your support - send stuff without subliminal stuff that makes me want to do stuff that like I don't want to do dude, and tweets to @cjswift ex machina

and now a word from the bird...

Enjoy the Compulsory Parade Tonight

Fieldville - Tonight's compulsory parade will feature the Proctor of Fires and Transformers showing off his new fire truck/transformers. Citizens should be careful not to place themselves in corners or near buildings as the trucks transform into raging robotic destroyers.  The Council of Proctors is not responsible for a citizen's death or the death of a resident working for a citizen.

Be careful of the rage of machines tonight

Thanks for your support - send Optimus Prime, overlords, flimsy paper, lite beer, ear mites, frantic cats, and tweets to @cjsiwft ex machina

Now a word from the bird...

Forecasters Change Short-term View

Fieldville - Forecasters today say that because of the recent activity detected at the edge of the world, they are modifying their forecast.

Expect changes in the weather soon!!!

Thanks for your support - send gas for my mower and tweets to @cjswift ex machina

Now from the Word Bird

Word Bird Words of Wisdom

Words from Word Bird

Thanks Word Bird

Mayor of Cattown Attempts to Poison Citizen's Minds

Fieldville - Early this morning a magazine was found about Cob Park, that has been debunked by the Proctor of Debunking and Righteousness as, "Total Bunk."

"Citizens should shield their eyes and immediately report any suspicious materials at or around Cob Park - known Cattown sympathizers have been spotted in several zones."

If you see this - don't, for the love of the DSL, look at it!

Just to be sure to be able to identify the banned material mentioned above here is a close-up of the photo on the so called magazine.

Thanks for your support - don't send any banned materials, but do send tweets to @cjswift ex machina

Now a word from the bird...

DSL Orders Round Buildings to be Erected in Fieldville

Fieldville - the Dear Supreme Leader has ordered, in a very compasionate way, the erection of round buildings in Fieldville.  Citizens planning a new home, will now have to consider, in a compasionate way, how they will build it in a round sort of way.

Citizens, your next home will be round!

Thanks for your support - send curvy building materials, lawn maintenance mannuals, poorly written instructions, inadequate directions, blindly followed GPS directions, and tweets to @cjswift ex machina

Now a word from the bird...

Thanks Word Bird!

Buckets are Waking - Spring is Here

Fieldville - On quiet nights, when there are no late evening trails and sentencings, you can hear the singing of the frogs and bucket lifts as they search for a mate. Sure as bad gas in your lawn mower - Spring has sprung.

Listen to the bucket lifts tonight, as they sing for a mate

Thanks for your support - send 70 degree days, brunch, big money at Menard's, flight simulators, anti-gravity boots, pneumatics and other funny spellings, and tweets to @cjswift ex machina

A Breezy Day in South Fieldville

South Fieldville - It's a breezy day here in South Fieldville.  Most citizens with boats have them tied to the main Mud Lake marina.  On days like this citizens should have their residents clean their boats to bristol shine.  While your resident is swabbing your deck, you mister citizen, should be shopping at the South Fieldville Pedmall.  All the cobs spent between now and return to Fieldville will help permanent citizens by adding to the Open Accusition Day bail fund.

Your boats should be in bristol shape

Thanks for your support - send teak oil, anchor polish, capek lifesavers, lockers full of tangled line, bilge water showers, leaky stuffboxes, rats, and tweets to @cjswift ex machina

and now a word from the bird...

Fieldville Sanatorium Updates its Psychic Engines

Fieldville - Fieldville Sanatorium updated its Psychic Engines.  The Proctor of Medical Equipment and Bridges issued the following statement, "We of the Council of Proctors, are proud to announce a whole new concept in the treatment of vapors and other diseased humors.  We are now on the cutting edge (ha ha even us proctors can make a pun) of the medical arts."

Almost painless treatment for the Vapors

Thanks for your support - send Podcasts in Swedish, glossolalia, duckbill snow shovels, X-Men pajamas, and tweets to @cjswift ex machina

and now a word from the bird...

Another Annoying Mutiverse Time Bubble

South Fieldville - Yet another annoying Multiverse Time Bubble showed up today in the pedmall plaza.  Citizens have complained to the South Fieldville Counsel of Proctors, but the proctors have issued a statement saying that complainers must contact Local 34 of the International Brotherhood of the Druidic Way for complaints about time bubbles.  Local 34 was not immediately available for comment.

Another Multiverse Time Bubble in South Fieldville Pedmall Plaza

Thanks for your support - send Mr. Bubble, bubble gum, AK47 brand aphid killer, windscreens, Neighbor-B-Gone brand fencing products, epees, etuis, certificates of merit, bonus rounds, Flab Eraser brand cinch-belts. Yes yes Yevette, plastic swing-sets for the front yard, Porch Boy™ upholstered beer coolers, and tweets to @cjswift ex machina

And now a word from the bird...