(Click the picture above for more detail on this breaking story)WASHINGTON, IA -- In a continuing rash of UFO and alien sightings and new twist has occurred in the small town of Washington -- a rent in the fabric of space/time sprang into existence at the corner of Iowa Avenue and Main Street. Homeland Security Cam 435-23-W caught the event as it unfolded. Local residents are urged to remain calm, but to stock up on bread, eggs and Jell-O in the interim.
It seems the crafty aliens have taken a form that will make them hard to distinguish from regular traffic control devices deployed throughout the historic downtown area. Public safety has issued the following statement, "Citizens in zones 1&2 should stay indoors during construction and should not panic if they find a traffic control device at their front doors. If these devices appear before curfew, simply text their nearest proctor or party member with the appropriate locating information. Citizens should not attempt to contact any traffic control device until they hear the all-clear signal from Homeland Security."
Street Level urges everyone to keep up-to-date on all their mandatory vaccinations and keep an adequate supply of Jell-O in their home shelter. Do not leave any pets unattended after curfew and keep your radios tuned to CONELRAD 640 and 1240 on your AM dial.
Thank you for your support and send Geiger counters, X-Ray glasses, and twitters to @cjswift
It seems the crafty aliens have taken a form that will make them hard to distinguish from regular traffic control devices deployed throughout the historic downtown area. Public safety has issued the following statement, "Citizens in zones 1&2 should stay indoors during construction and should not panic if they find a traffic control device at their front doors. If these devices appear before curfew, simply text their nearest proctor or party member with the appropriate locating information. Citizens should not attempt to contact any traffic control device until they hear the all-clear signal from Homeland Security."
Street Level urges everyone to keep up-to-date on all their mandatory vaccinations and keep an adequate supply of Jell-O in their home shelter. Do not leave any pets unattended after curfew and keep your radios tuned to CONELRAD 640 and 1240 on your AM dial.
Thank you for your support and send Geiger counters, X-Ray glasses, and twitters to @cjswift
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